We are part of a family

Every one of us is part of a family: we all have a mother and a father.  Some of us have other siblings and extended family as well.  In modern times, the concept of family has become much more fluid but at its core, every family is meant to include adults who are the keepers of tradition and wisdom and children who look to their parents, guardians and other adults in order to learn the traditions and wisdom that are meant to be passed on to them.

The writings of Ben Sirach the Sage speak of some of this wisdom in today’s first reading in the context of the family of faith to which we all belong: Whoever honours a father atones for sins ... and whoever respects their mother is like one who lays up treasure (Sir 3:3-4).  Children don’t always know what it means to respect their parents or their elders, except if they have learned this behaviour from others.  Respect begins with an appreciation for the fact that parents have wisdom and knowledge which they are willing to impart.

It is often only when children themselves become adults, and their parents grow older, that we are able to truly grasp the meaning of the wisdom that is set before us today.  If we have had the privilege of spending time in the company of elderly parents or grandparents, the words of Ben Sirach will apply even more to our situations: help your father in his old age, and do not grieve him as long as he lives.  Even if his mind fails, be patient with him ... kindness to your father will not be forgotten (Sir 3:12-14).

Today, we continue our prayerful gaze upon the holy family of Nazareth.  Saint Luke tells us that Jesus was obedient to Joseph and Mary ... and increased in wisdom and in years, and in favour with God and human beings (Lk 2:51-52).  Jesus’ parents probably were the first to tell him about the wisdom of Ben Sirach.  I wonder if the words we heard today from the prophet made sense to him when he first heard them read to him, or whether he too needed to grow in his understanding of their worth.  As time went on, perhaps Jesus heard these words echoed in his heart as he gazed upon Joseph in his old age.  We are not told any details of that time in their life, but we can surmise that there must have been a time when Jesus helped Joseph, just as Joseph had helped him in his younger years.  Perhaps there were times in Joseph’s life when his mind began to fail him.  Jesus is always patient with us; perhaps Joseph was among the first to benefit from his divine son’s kindnesses.

We too can ask Jesus to show us the same kindness that he showed to his parents.  We can also ask him to teach us to be patient with ourselves and with others.  Saint Paul gives us some practical advice about how we can recognize the fruit of God’s kindness and patience at work within us.  As God’s chosen ones, he says ... clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness and patience (Col 3:12).  Each of these is a gift from God.  In fact, only with God’s help can we learn how to recognize these traits and to use them wisely.

In the coming days, let us all ask Jesus to help us to open our hearts to him so that his word can dwell richly in our hearts (cf Col 3:16), and let us give thanks for the gift of our families, the schools of discipleship in which we live every day.